Hi friend! As always, everyone’s buzzing about goal setting and resolutions this first week of the new year. And I get it – the new year brings a fresh start and we’re off to a good start when we have our priorities in order. Even so, I didn’t want to kick off the year with a post about goal setting and habits – mostly because if you read my blog then you likely read other personal development sites as well! Instead, I wanted to write you some words of encouragement for the new year.
Look for your potential before flaws.
As I was writing my blog on inspirational quotes for the new year, I came across one that really stood out to me. “We spend January 1st walking through our lives, room by room, drawing up a list of work to be done, cracks to be patched. Maybe this year, to balance the list, we ought to walk through the rooms of our lives…not looking for flaws but for potential.” – Ellen Goodman
How different of a perspective is this?
Every year we hear about all the changes people want to make in their lives, and I think it makes us feel like there always has to be something to change or work on. Don’t get me wrong, I absolutely think there is always room for growth…but that doesn’t mean we need to nitpick at each and every little thing. I think that contributes to us feeling like we’re inadequate.
Imagine the difference it would make if we looked for our potential first, before the flaws. If we also celebrated our wins, no matter how small.
So my first piece of encouragement for you this year is to celebrate your wins. To look for opportunities. To recognize your potential. This doesn’t come naturally, especially in the world we live in, so it may take some time for you to get in the habit of doing this. It may be helpful to start by asking yourself every week what’s one thing that you’re proud of yourself for. Then you can build yourself up to asking yourself on a daily basis!
Ah…failure. The word everyone is afraid of, which probably started from school and the pressure of having good grades, am I right?! The truth is, failure is necessary. How are we supposed to learn and grow if everything we ever tried was a success the first time around? There would literally be nothing for us to ever learn.
The fear of failure holds so many of us back from even attempting our goals. We don’t want to let others know that our first attempt wasn’t a success. I think a part of this also comes from “overnight successes,” which are never really overnight successes anyway. We tend to glance over the hard work and hundreds of failed attempts that people make before they finally hit the mark. I wonder why that is.
So I want to encourage you to look for ways to fail this year. Get comfortable with failure. Embrace it.
There’s actually another quote that I want to share, which is also from my roundup of quotes for the new year.
I hope that in this year to come, you make mistakes. Because if you are making mistakes, then you are making new things, trying new things, learning, living, pushing yourself, changing yourself, changing your world. You’re doing things you’ve never done before, and more importantly, you’re doing something.Neil Gaiman
How can you make mistakes and “fail” this year? Try new things. Has there been a creative activity that looks cool but you’ve never taken the steps to try? Try it! Is there a physical activity that seems strenuous and you talk yourself out of doing? Give it a try, making sure to discuss it with your doctor of course.
I’ve had my own share of analyzing success and failure in my life, and I know embracing failure is something I plan to implement this year as well!
Last, but certainly not least, have fun.
Life is way too short to not enjoy it and make the most out of the cards you’ve been dealt.
Naturally as an enneagram type 1 wing 9, I have a strong sense of morals. I tend to look at things very black or white…and this can make it difficult to have fun sometimes. I’m learning to take things as they come and to not let something that won’t bother me 2 years from now stress me out in the present.
I recently spent some time with one of my longest and closest friends, and we literally just hung out for a couple of hours, went to the mall, and grabbed a bite to eat. But spending time with her again made me realize how grateful I am for a friend like her who brings play back into my life. With her I can bring out my silly side, and it’s so freeing to let yourself have fun.
It’s so easy to get wrapped up in the hype of setting goals for the year, but I want you to know that you don’t have to be on go 24/7. You’re allowed to rest, and you’re certainly allowed to have fun in life.
I hope this year brings you peace and joy. Of course, we can’t predict what obstacles life throws our way, but we can make the choice of how we respond. And our responses can impact our overall well-being.
I hope you take action towards your goals this year, and implement whatever habits are needed to create the life of your dreams. A life where you’re prioritizing, communicating boundaries, and healing.
I have so much planned for the year, and can’t wait to bring you more tools and resources to support you in your endeavors.